Monday, February 18, 2019

Am I My Brother's Keeper?



These were my remarks to students at assembly on February 18, 2019.

In the Scripture readings for Mass today, we read about the story of Cain and Abel. You remember the story: Adam and Eve have two sons, Cain (the older) and Abel. Cain grows jealous of his younger brother, because, Scripture tells us, they both made offerings to the Lord, and “The LORD looked with favor on Abel and his offering, but on Cain and his offering he did not.” (Genesis 4). 

Scripture is very economical with words, but I think we can read into this much more than just unhappiness about an “offering.” Abel was likely the favored one, the one that was more naturally gifted. Perhaps you have a sibling, or a friend, or a classmate, that is (fill in the blank) smarter, prettier, more athletic, and gets more attention than you.  It’s easy to get jealous of that person, like Cain did of his younger brother. So he invites Abel out to the fields, and then kills him. God comes and asks Cain, “Where is your brother Abel?,” and Cain says, “I don’t know. Am I my brother’s keeper?” 

“Am I my brother’s keeper?” Cain could have easily lived today, because his implication, that I am NOT my brother’s keeper, that I am concerned only for myself, is very much in vogue. We’re studying abortion and euthanasia in our junior morality class—and advocates of both take a similar position: “This is MY body. I can do with it as I please. I am not responsible for others, nor do they have any authority over me. They should mind their own business.” 

But over and over again, Jesus tells us to look out for each other. “Whatever you do to the least of my brothers,” he tells us, you do unto me. “ 

We’re not likely to go out and kill the people we’re jealous of like Cain did. But we ARE inclined to speak poorly about those people, to find ways to put them down, embarrass them, to act destructively. Our tongue is the most powerful “weapon” we have. We can use it, if inclined, to tear people apart.  I’ll bet that all of you can remember unkind things that people have said to you or written about you, even if that were years ago. It stings. And it stings for a long time. 

But on the other hand, what we say to people can also build them up. Kind remarks, too, are memorable. I remember when I was 14 or 15 at McGill and had a locker next to the prettiest girl in the school. Once I cracked a corny joke and she laughed, genuinely, and told me “You’re so funny.” That’s all she said, but I remember it 40 years later. 

So be courageous enough to become your “brother’s keeper.” Do that by going out of your way to be kind to others, to build them up, to compliment them about things worthy of our notice. You can make a transformational difference in the life of your classmates, your younger brother or sister, even your parents, if you are willing to do that. 

Let’s not tear each other up, fueled by jealousy, like Cain was. Do the opposite. Compliment your classmates. Praise them. At the end of the day, do an inventory of who you built up that day.  Not only will it lift them up, you’ll be surprised how much better you feel about yourself, too. 

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