They
call it “rubbernecking.” That’s what we instinctually do when we’re driving in
a car and pass by an accident. We strain our necks trying to peer out and catch
sight of the victims of the crash.
I
think we see many analogous versions of rubbernecking all around us. What is the attraction of so many of
the “reality shows” that are on TV today? Why does the Jerry Springer show get
good ratings? I went on line to see the story line of some recent Springer
episodes: “Lipstick Lesbians,” “I Slept with your Brother’s Boyfriend,” “Your Husband Knocked Me Up,” and “Out
of Control Catfights.” Why do we watch these shows? Why do we care about the
lives of pathetic people living wrecked lives? Psychologists say it’s partly
because we enjoy feeling superior to others. When we watch “humilitainment,” as one person called it, we
feel better about ourselves at the expense of someone else.
The
problem is when there’s a car accident, and when drivers-by rubberneck, the
police will tell you that there are often more wrecks, as people aren’t paying attention
to where they are driving.
And
there’s a parable in there somewhere, I think. When we become fascinated by the misery of others, when we
focus on what is wrong about someone else’s life, it’s easy to lose sight of
where we are going. And when we
are swamped by the wreckage of other people’s lives, when we become accustomed
to what is twisted and sad, it’s too easy for us to define deviancy down, too easy to set low bars for ourselves about what is right and good.
In
contrast, Scripture tells us that “ whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right,
whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is
any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. (Phillipians 4:8)
I will be honest with you. I find
that verse challenging. I have a tendency to go right to the negative. My kids
will tell you if we’re watching TV, I often make cutting remarks about people, disputing
the claims they’re making, ridiculing their motives. I need-all of us, I think, need—to be in the presence of optimists,
people that see the good in others despite their flaws, people who help us focus on what is
beautiful and not what is ugly.
Our world needs a few more optimists. I
think that’s true of high schools, too, especially at this time of year as we
become stressed about A.P exams, final exams, failing, or graduating. When we’re
too busy or tired, it’s easy to become cranky, self-centered, mean-spirited,
ugly with each other. Let’s work to be the opposite. Let’s go out of way to
compliment, to thank, to congratulate, to become people that dwell on what's honorable, pure or excellent in others.
I'll be praying for you these next couple of weeks, and especially for you seniors. Work hard.
I'll be praying for you these next couple of weeks, and especially for you seniors. Work hard.